And so they went up to the fifth floor. The sign on this door said, “This floor has no men. It is only here to prove that women are impossible to satisfy. Thanks for visiting.” * * * My wife keeps telling everyone that she can read their minds, but she never can. She is telepathetic.' A pregnant Irish woman from Dublin gets in a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, when she wakes up she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor

Feminism? No thanks. I prefer gender equality. Water? No thanks. I prefer H20.” — kalifornias-fashion.tumblr.com this to as many women as you can - to give them an education! PowerPoint Humor for Boys - And Girls Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have! Discover more jokes Turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey. A woman went out and did not return home. On the next day she told her husband that she had slept at her friend's house. Not believing her, the husband called 10 of her best friends and none of them knew what he was talking about.A girl in our gang was called spanner. One look from her would tighten your nuts, her mate was called meteorologist, you could look in her eyes and tell the weather.

Whether they’re punny or a play on words, the best corny jokes are the ones that you can reserve for your family dinner table after you’ve finished a weeknight meal — because who doesn’t need a big laugh after a long day? Hold a family “stand-up comedy night” and see who can deliver the corniest jokes, preferably with a spotlight and a microphone. Or share them with your kids so they can take them to school and make their friends giggle, too. They walk to a bar and the man with the Lab puts on a pair of sunglasses just before he goes in. The bartender sees him enter and says “Sorry, no dogs allowed!”. Ready for this, the man responds, “But he’s my guide dog!”. The bartender immediately apologizes and leads him to a free table. A m**... was having an affair with a 15 year old girl who had lied about her age, when he learned the truth he broke it off and over the next few week guilt set in and he confessed to his wife. She screamed at him, A skydiver doesn’t even need a parachute. But he needs a parachute if he wants to skydive a second time. If you give a man a match, he’ll be warm for a little while. Set that man on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.

35. Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?

Honey, got hit by car when I was out of office. Paula brought me to Hospital. They're doing tests and X-rays now. Blow to my head very strong, fortunately it didn't cause serious injury, but I have three broken ribs, a compound fracture in left leg, and they may have to amputate right foot. Get ready: Some of what's to come is quite punny. Some might even make your eyes roll. But, deep down, if we are honest, who doesn't smile at corny jokes? Others might even make you laugh so hard you cry, so don't say we didn't warn you. Many are one-liners so you can remember them to share and share again, and your kids can retell them to their friends too, maybe even years later. Now get ready to make some memories filled with laughter with these 70 hilariously funny jokes!

If your fam is perpetually busy, but could definitely use some laughs in the middle of all that hustle, write down a “Joke of the Day” on the kitchen whiteboard, and your kids will look forward to reading corny jokes each and every day. He writes, “Head was found on the main avenew.” Then he crosses it out. “Head was found on the main avenoo.” He crosses that out too. “Head was found on the main avineu.” He shakes his head and crosses that out as well. Russia has become the victim of worldwide jokes. Most people around the world make fun of Putin’s army and its inability to defeat Ukraine’s troops. There is indeed a big difference between the Russian army portrayed in the movies and the Russian army in the real world: Credit: PINimg.com You are so ugly that when you entered your dog in an ugly dog contest, they gave you a ribbon and a scratch behind the ear. A: Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

Offensive Jokes About Relationships

After several years of being single, she started to get tired of being so lonely and miserable. So she decided she’d take one last shot at love and sign up for a matchmaking service where she was very clear and specific on what she was looking for: She wanted a man who would be faithful and would never cheat on her, gentle and would never lay a hand on her, and finally, he must be skilled and satisfying in bed. After hearing all of that, the man thinks it’s a lost cause and decides to ignore the whole thing. But after spending hours at the bar downing drinks, he became so wasted that he decided to enter the bet. I identify with football players because I know what it is like to spend your whole life training for a large, jewel-encrusted ring.' So the woman tosses the bag of drugs into the toilet, then flushes it. The bag swishes down. The cop then stares at the woman's empty hand as the bag is flushed down.