The last chapter even proposes strategies to improve a difficult relationship to an emotional immature person one encounter a time. Strategies are proposed on how to lead the communication towards positive and effective grounds. While “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” (Gibson’s first book) goes into introducing the concept and the types of parents that are likely to be EI and validating the mental and emotional experience of what it was like for the adult child to grow up with the EI parents, this sequel goes into greater depth about the relationship dynamics that make having a mature healthy relationship (at the very least, for yourself) with EI parents challenging.

Chadley Zobolas, a licensed clinical social worker from Denver, Colorado, gives the example of responding to an upset child with “it could be so much worse.” It’s a little unsettling how some examples of conversations were like deja vu for me. I was left thinking “how did you know that?!?” Which was indescribably wonderful. The isolation, questioning, sadness, and a plethora (love that word) of other emotions just… became somehow soft. Emotional reactivity is the intensity with which you respond to emotions. High emotional reactivity is a sign of poor emotional regulation and involves intense shifts in your emotional responses. After reading “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” I was definitely gaining a better understanding of all the dynamics and things at play within myself. I felt almost “exposed.” But it left me wondering “okay, so what now?” Then I read this book. That being said, this book totally stands alone on it’s own merits. So go ahead and start here if you’re so inclined.Keeping this compassion in mind, it’s possible to improve your relationship dynamic with emotionally immature parents. Zobolas and Louis recommend: It is tough to accept that at times, even with little fault of yours, it is you who would have to change your perspective or behaviour. It is you who have to respond in a different manner for things to be a bit more bearable and perhaps even favourable. In emotionally heightened situations, people can’t self-reflect and therefore have no way to grow. Instead, they are limited to blaming others and expecting others to change first. It is only natural to think this way. But this pattern of thought over a continued period of time leads to self disconnection and that is undesirable.

Fortunately, the brilliance of Gibson’s book sheds the light of understanding and provides the keys to healing for countless recovering individuals. This book is readable, relevant, grounded in solid science, and yet so accessible to the person searching for answers and healing from their wounds. It is a must-read for every student of human behavior and every mental health professional.” This book by its own won’t resolve issues. Why? I had to read 2-5 books on each topic , like: boundaries and limits, assertiveness, narcissistic and bordeline abuse, radical honesty, DBT, self esteem workbooks, critical voice and its affect, and more.High emotional reactivity can make children feel unsafe to express emotions. 2. Emotional unavailability I agree with another reviewer who writes below that Gibson creates an understanding for both, victim and offender (seeing the offender as a victim too), while focusing on the one who suffers and wants to change. She is creating an understanding for a cycle of behaviour learned as a child and passed on to the own children. This is the first book I read from the author, so I don't know what is written in her first book on the topic. This book, however, is focused on learning to set boundaries and on learning how to self-heal and build more healthy relationships with other people. Amongst others I loved that the author suggests to lower your expectations with your parents or other emotional immature persons in your life and to raise expectations for other relationships. So beautiful and true. Allow yourself to grieve the type of relationship you may be craving but probably can't have with this person. This book has validated so much for me, shown be where I still need to focus and improve, highlighted some bad habits I still need to break, but it has also given me space to breathe. To feel one step closer to “normal.” I really enjoyed this book, I feel it has some really good and helpful tools for people who struggle with the strain of having emotionally immature parents in their lives.

Shame is a feeling / emotion (thus it eventually passes), not a definition / statement of my worth.The author gives lots of great examples, even examples of specific wording to use. That part is especially helpful to me, because I had no idea how to disagree amiably: "it sounds like we have different viewpoints, and that's OK." Or "you may be right but I'd like to do it this way this time." I needed to let this one settle for a few days after I finished reading before I could write a review. I have always struggled with feeling like the odd one out in a variety of situations. Family, friend circles, co-workers, etc. There were so many times it left me questioning if I was just not a worthwhile person, or what was wrong with me. This is a supplemental guide that supports author Lindsay C. Gibson’s other book Adult Children Of Emotionally Immature Parents. I’m like a Lindsay C. Gibson fan boy. I’m amazed by her empathy, breath of knowledge, originality and skillful presentation.